Thirty two days in and going OK so far….
Am I an optimist or a pessimist? an excellent question and had you asked me a few years ago I would definitely have said an optimist but times change and our lives take unexpected turns.
A few years ago I worked for a small business and I was given every reason to believe my position was not only secure but that I could look forward to both promotion and an increase in my salary. six weeks later. A change in company direction, decided by the board after my meeting with the MD meant that my services were no longer required.
I was assured that I did my job both competently and efficiently and that this was not a reflection on me but I was out. I was devastated, I really enjoyed my job and I liked the people I worked with. I more than justified the salary I was paid but… To be fair my redundancy package was generous.
It took me several months to get over it and the sense of worthlessness that you can only comprehend if you have been in this situation. It took me nine months to find an alternative source of income. This event was the defining moment when I ceased to be an optimist. They do say that time is a great healer and this is undoubtedly true but the fact that I’m writing about it now several years later and that it still makes me feel cheated is evidence that the hurt has not totally dissipated.
Other factors come into play, as you get older there are fewer jobs open to you unless you have the right “skill set” and although age discrimination is forbidden it is clear that a younger candidate will undoubtedly be viewed more favourably than those of us the wrong side of 55. More fuel to add to the pessimistic outlook.
As a self employed photographer I can be both a pessimist and an optimist on the same day, but I would generally like to think that I am in the glass half full camp most of the time. I enjoy what I do and sometimes I even get paid for it.